Wednesday, April 14, 2010

gratefulness.

So tonight I was at life group and someone said the following after watching the Matt Chandler bible study on Philippians....
"when i am grateful for my parents it is easier for me to love them"
dang man, talk about intense hurlage. These past few weeks I have been so wrapped up in the unfairness of my parents and how i don't agree with so much that they do. When I say wrapped up I mean completely consumed. I thought about it all the time and it affected my mood greatly, mainly because i was/am on the receiving end of all the unfairness. I told people about it, who in reality could probably care less about my family situation because they have more stressful things to think about. I don't understand why they do what they do and its really not my place to, all i am really suppose to do is be grateful for what they have done and will continue to do for me. Lets face it im probably not the best daughter in the world, but there are worse. The Lord wants us to be grateful for all that we have no matter how crappy or amazing it is. I should prob start being more grateful even though they work my nerves to no end... but lets be honest for a minute whose parents do not get on their nerves. I love my parents, I just started thinking that maybe if im more appreciative of them then I will be able to show my love better. Maybe I will be happier.
Not to say that me writing this blog or even coming to the realization that I'm not always... or more like I'm never appreciative will make everything better, but i think its a good start. I know that I have the parents I have for a reason. The Lord knew my parents would get divorced and that my mom would move to new york and not be a good mom and that my step-mom would take the place of her and be more like my mom. He even knew she would get on my nerves, i would get on her nerves, and that we would totally clash in every way possible. He also knew all the times we would have fun together and the times when we actually act like a mother and child. However, He put me in it for a reason. Maybe that reason is gratefulness or maybe patience or maybe the observation of how i do and do not want my family to be.... whatever it is... It's good, maybe not now but in the future.
This is kind of a summary of how I have felt. There has been a lack of understanding which causes frustration which shows in my daily life.

I don't understand Your ways
Oh but I will give You my song
Give You all of my praise
You hold on to all my pain
With it You are pulling me closer
And pulling me into Your ways

Now around every corner
And up every mountain
I'm not looking for crowns
Or the water from fountains
I'm desperate in seeking, frantic believing
That the sight of Your face
Is all that I need
I will say to You

It's gonna be worth it
It's gonna be worth it
It's gonna be worth it all
I believe this
It's gonna be worth it
It's gonna be worth it
It's gonna be worth it all
I believe this

You're gonna be worth it
You're gonna be worth it
You're gonna be worth it all
I believe this
You're gonna be worth it
You're gonna be worth it
You're gonna be worth it all
I believe this


-rita springer
worth it all.

3 comments:

  1. you have left me in tears this morning.....Theres plenty that I don't understand and even in my hurt and almost anger, I know that It is gonna be worth it....I literally am swimming now so I will stop...but thank you...i love you

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  2. Shanny boo, I love you so much. I hope you realize how truly amazing you are and how much you mean to me!! I am proud of you and everything that you have accomplished!! I love you!! We will continue our talk later!! : )

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  3. Three words... I LOVE YOU. And IIIIIIIIIIIIIII am grateful for youuuuuuuuu. Know that. :)

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